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    Know Your Newbies!

    By Titmowse | Writer @ CozyFrog | SEP.05.2002
    new·bie
    Pronunciation: 'nü-bE, 'nyü-
    Function: noun
    Etymology: irregular from new
    Date: 1985: BEGINNER, NOVICE; especially: a newcomer to cyberspace

Sometimes dictionary definitions leave a lot to be desired. The word newbie is a prime example of this. Newbie may be slang. It may be new addition to the language, but in its short life, the word newbie has taken on far more meaning than its definition implies.

"Newbie is a word with myriad meaning. It can be simple and just translate into novice. It can also take on the definitions of thief..."
A person can be vastly experienced in the Internet and still be considered a newbie. For instance, the person who informs an adult webmaster message board that they have years of programming and marketing experience in the non-adult field will be labeled a newbie. Hell, a first-time poster at any adult webmaster message board is gonna get the newbie moniker.

In a previous article I made a plea for the newbie. I begged veteran adult webmasters to be kind to them and help them. I reminded them that they were once newbies. I still stand by that idea of mentoring. One of the greatest strengths of this industry is its understood atmosphere of cooperation and assistance.

Non adult enterprises are mired in a mindset of secrecy, distrust and homogenization. They look at us with our traffic trades and open forums and refuse to accept the possibility that ours might be the better way. We are willing to give knowledge and information free of charge to the uninitiated. We openly help each other, even the newbies.

If you are a newbie to online porn, I say good for you. Keep working. Keep learning. Keep your chin up. Don’t be offended when I warn more experienced adult webmasters:

Proceed with extreme caution when dealing with newbies.

The sad fact is none of us really know the people we’re dealing with in cyberspace. That poor desperate kid that begs for a traffic trade could very well be an adept swindler. The first-time poster with the sexy girl nickname might actually be the male asshole who spammed your board last week. Just because your latest affiliate claims ignorance about how the adult web works doesn’t mean it’s okay for them to break your Terms of Service.

I’ve seen countless webmasters relay their horror tales of being screwed by some damned newbie. The basic plot of their stories is pretty much the same: They helped a newbie by giving them advice, graphics, traffic or even a space on their server. Then that newbie turns around and bites them in their benevolent ass.

Untitled Page

Newbies, if you’ve ever wondered why adult webmasters are rude, inattentive to your pleas or just downright mean, take into account they were probably burned by a newbie. Mind you, some adult online professionals will dislike and discourage you for your newbieness simply because they’re jerks. There’s not much you can do to win the favor of those types and my best advice is learn to recognize them and avoid them.

For those veteran adult web types who want to open their hearts and share their skills with a novice, my belief is this: Newbie is another word for stranger. Look at the adult Internet newbie as you would any stranger in real life. When a stranger knocks on your door, you don’t open it up and allow them to search through your belongings do you? You wouldn’t give a stranger on the street directions to your house would you? The same logic applies to the adult web newbie. Before you go giving some green kid the password to your ftp server, think about the repercussions.

If you’re thinking about blessing that poor newb on the message board with your hard-learned knowledge, make sure you’re going to give advice that won’t be used as a tool to hurt you or your reputation.

Lamentably, there are a lot of wolves that conceal themselves in the sheep’s clothing of the newbie. They prey on the goodhearted and turn generous people into bitter ones. They sully the reputations of all the newbies that follow them and contribute nothing to our industry. They blame their deceptions on their inexperience and disappear when they are found out. They are the main reason adult webmasters are mean to newbies.

Newbie is a word with myriad meaning. It can be simple and just translate into novice. It can also take on the definitions of thief, liar or fool. What kind of newbie are you?


By Titmowse | Writer @ CozyFrog
Titmowse has a special lily pad as the head writer for CozyFrog and it's family of webmaster resources. She also writes text content for several websites and is the owner of her very own MowseBytes Newsletter.

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