It’s hard out there for a pimp. You gotta hustle your stuff before thousands of fools who don’t give a damn if your rent gets paid. After all that pushing you’re lucky to make a couple transactions a day and for that, you get peanuts. The next morning, you get up and do it all over again. Adding insult to injury, you hang out with your fellow pimps, trying to pump your rep but all you hear is shit about your spamming ways.
| "You want your fellow pimps to give you the respect you deserve? Then don’t flood the message boards with obnoxious signatures or drive-by spam posts. There are ways to spread your love around without getting slammed or worse, banned." |
Uh huh. You’re breaking our heart.
Look, pimp. Don’t be singing that sad song. We all live that life. Each one of us has to make the Sisyphus journey every day, trying to convince guiltless freeloaders to fork over that sweet, sweet cash. Some of us sell services and products directly to adult webmasters but in the end, all of us want to make a name for ourselves. There’s not a single one of us who can’t benefit from a little bit of notoriety within our field. We’re all in the same crowded boat and you ain’t no more or less special than the rest of us.
You want your fellow pimps to give you the respect you deserve? Then don’t flood the message boards with obnoxious signatures or drive-by spam posts. There are ways to spread your love around without getting slammed or worse, banned. Everybody already knows the game - the more you post the better known you become. We join the boards in order to share knowledge, trade links and make deals. Almost none of us want to be "marketed" to. We save that for the surfers.
The trick is to realize that, on adult webmaster message boards, your wisdom, humor and participation are your best marketing tools. We may act all jaded and snarky but the fact is, we need community as much as anybody else. Some of us are new, some us aren’t but most of look to the boards as kind of haven where we can share news, tips, personal stories and be among people that are sympathetic to us. We make deals on boards. We make friendships. We get to know the character of the people in our industry. Do you want to be famous for being helpful and informative or would you rather be notorious as some clueless, spamming loser?
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Let’s start with Your Signature.
Every board offers an option for a sig file. It’s expected. When someone reads your post or reply, they look at your sig and that sig tells them a lot about you. When you fill your sig with a bunch of links, colored fonts in different sizes and animated graphics, not only is that shit hard on the eyes, it tends to piss webmasters off. Nobody wants to read your entire resume courtesy of your board signature. A simple link or two will suffice. You start adding multiple sig links and you just make yourself confusing to others. Multiple signature links make it look like you can’t decide what you’re about. As for sig graphics, one is okay but remember that it’s going to be seen over and over again. A lot of adult webmasters disable images when they’re on the boards precisely because signature images are irritating.
Now. It’s time to talk about Posting.
Never forget, you are addressing ADULT WEBMASTERS. We know all the ways to play the posting game because we invented it. When you post a thread that is blatant spam you’re going to get called on it and you won’t be able to hind behind the newbie excuse.
Some boards might let you get way with spam as long as there are plenty of boobies in your post but not really. We’ve seen boobies. There better be a fair ratio of participatory threads in relation to "what do you think of this model" threads or you’ll get spanked. Some boards are moderated by females (who are immune to boobies) so don’t be surprised when your pic spam gets deleted or moved.
As well, those fake "have you seen this site?" or "what do you think of this program?" posts are just stupid. Even when you hide your affiliate ID behind a URL shortener, we’re going to see through your bullshit. In that vein, forget about those posts where you accuse some sponsor or webmaster of cheating or theft. Those never end well, especially for the thread starter.
In fact, just knock off the role-playing period. Be yourself. Ask questions. Join in discussions. Give advice. Read and learn. You build a good reputation by acting like a responsible board member. You pimp yourself when you’re golden, not when you’re a spamming, fool-posting asshole.
Looking for a friendly and helpful adult webmaster forum? Visit our very own Cozy Campus for discussions, newbie help, industry announcements and more!
This business isn’t rainbows and miracles. You make success the hard way and you make name for yourself the same way.