Adult webmasters are a quirky bunch. So many of us have been doing things a certain way that our actions look downright quaint to technically-inclined outside observers.

For example, most adult webmasters use ICQ for Instant Messaging software. The entire rest of the Internet population uses AOL Instant Messenger, Yahoo Messenger or MSN Messenger. I’ve read webmaster after webmaster write: "Why does everybody use ICQ? It sucks!"

"If you want other adult webmasters to take you seriously you have to actually work at it. You have to join conversations and begin discussions that are worth having."

Why do we use ICQ? If I told you because PowWow was lame and ICQ was the best IM at the time, would you understand how far back this ICQ dependency goes? From the practical inception of the World Wide Web, adult webmasters were chatting with each other through Bulletin Boards and e-mail.

When live IRC chat software came along we were there. When Apache and Mirabilis gave us private chat software like PowWow and ICQ, we used the hell out of it. PowWow is barely around but ICQ stuck. By the time AOL bought ICQ and introduced AIM, some adult webmasters owned ICQ contact lists hundreds of names long.

As an industry, many of us have a prejudice against AOL. AOL used to have this tacky rendering engine in their browser that screwed up images on sites outside of the AOL network. In addition, AOL users just seemed like hapless newbs. We used ICQ because we weren’t about to touch AOL Instant Messenger. Then came Yahoo IM and IM software from Microsoft. By that point, adult webmasters were entrenched in ICQ. Now we apply ICQ usage as almost an unspoken identity badge. If you want to chat live and in private with other adult webmasters, you better install ICQ. If you insist on resisting, you won’t be chatting with very many adult webmasters.

As I wrote, we’re a quirky bunch. Blogs and Social Networking sites like MySpace may be all the rage but our industry still gathers online via threaded, HTML-enabled message boards. Hey, at least we’re too hip for flatboards! Let the technology snobs laugh at us but the community software of choice for adult webmasters is vBulletin. Not blogs. Not social networking software. Not online group sites. Good old fashioned, text-based discussion. That presents a whole different set of unspoken standards for our quirky industry. How does one behave on adult webmaster message boards?

First off, as was written, adult webmasters have been meeting up online for well over a decade. Most of the OG force is gone but there are still some survivors from that era. There are those like me, that joined the ranks in 96-98. I tend to categorize us as the second-born. There are the webmasters that got into the game around 2000. If they’re still around, that means they did something right. In fact, any adult webmaster making a living has probably been at it for at least a year if not way more. Very few of these people stay away from the message boards completely. Some take breaks. Some don’t post as much as they used to. Some only post when their name or business is mentioned. Regardless, assume that practically everybody in our profession is lurking on an adult webmaster message board.

Second, we know you join an adult webmaster board to promote yourself and your business. You’re not fooling anybody. Just put your damn URL in your sig file like everybody else and stop trying to be clever with the spam. If you want other adult webmasters to take you seriously you have to actually work at it. You have to show your virtual face amongst your peers. You have to join conversations and begin discussions that are worth having. If the board you post on has a Spam/Announcement forum, then announce away. If your board offers are free spam post to recognized members, then become one. If a board member asks for help and you can help, do so once in while.

Third, when you join an adult webmaster board, other members WILL read your profile. By the time they discover you’ve got a free Yahoo email account or your ISP-provided homepage listed as a link to your porn site, you’ve already got two strikes against you. Get a paid hosting account and an email for it. A startup hosting package (domain registration and hosting) costs about $20.00 up front and $10.00 a month. You’re going to need one anyway. A real email and a real URL carry a lot of cred in adult webmasterland. If you can’t afford anything yet, at least fill out your profile a little. You don’t have to give your real name or address but you can surely post your country and interests.

Fourth, don’t enter bitching or boasting. We will not be amused. We will not be sympathetic when you tell us your sponsor kicked you off their affiliate program. We don’t care how many freeloaders you drew to your Yahoo Group. You can claim to be Lorenzo Lamas all damned day. We will laugh at you, play with you and then reveal to you your true identity - as if it were your heart, just-plucked from your chest. We are often mean and rude and that’s not going to stop. Then again...

We are not a bunch of slobbering goons, posting porn pictures with one hand. Those are surfers. There’s a difference.

Check back here for part two of this two-part article. Wherein our heroine, Titmowse, explores more truths about adult webmaster message boards and why they are so cool.

** Click Here For: On Board With Boards! - Part #2