I’ve been asked to break out the crystal ball, dust off the Tarot cards and look into the fire. I have been assigned to predict the future of Internet porn for the year 2010. Okay. That’s only four years from now. What’s the harm? If I’m right, I’m psychic! If I’m wrong, I can claim I was only speculating. Here’s my prediction:

"What we do as an industry should be done in the spirit of natural progression. The successful among us are the ones that see the trends and follow them."

In the year 2010, things will be either good or they’ll be bad. There ya go! Article over. Can I get my cookie now? Sigh. I’m told no articles = no cookie. Rats.

Wait! I know! I’ll make shit up! I’ll take tiny bits of current truth and follow them to a semi-logical conclusion! It worked for Nostradamus. Centuries from now, they’ll read my ambiguous quatrains and fit the bullshit to their own means! I can say stuff like:

1. In 2010, a powerful man - let’s call him “Bill Cates” - will have retired from his powerful position and will spend the rest of his life atoning for monopolizing the software industry with his bloated OS.

2. In 2010, database giant, “Harry Ellison” (natch) will be on wife number five.

3. In 2010, people will still buy porn on the Internet.

Wow. That was hard. I’m spent. Can I have my cookie now? I have to write more? Dammit!

Guess I’ll have to break out the I-Ching coins. Here we go. One line. Two lines. Changing line. Two hexagrams. Voila! No, seriously. I just consulted an ancient Chinese oracle about the future of the Internet porn industry in the year 2010. Before I tell you what the I-Ching told me, let me first explain a little about this ancient text for divination.

The I-Ching is was written so long ago, historians can only guess at the year and author. The best guess is that it was written sometime between the years 2852 BC ­ 2738 BCE, by the emperor Fu Hsi or Fu Xi. Old Fu may have been a real man but nobody can prove it. Compare him to Moses or King Arthur. Whatever. One day, Fu Hsi had a spiritual awakening or fell on his head. We can’t say. What we can say is that somebody wrote down a bunch of different predictions called Hexagrams. Technically, a Hexagram is a combination of two Trigrams but I digress.

Anyway, what you do is you either throw a bunch of yarrow sticks - or official I-Ching coins or western coins. In the case of western coins, you throw them six times and depending of the configuration of heads and tails, you come up with a line. The first three lines are the bottom of the Hexagram; the top three are the top. If you throw a moving line, you get a second Hexagram. In the modern I-Ching there are 64 Hexagrams.

I threw the coins. I got two Hexagrams with one moving line in position number two. A roll of two Hexagrams is pretty standard and means that the situation is changing. The first Hexagram is 25: WIU WANG. The second was 10: LIH.

25: WIU WANG - The Simple ­ Thunder below. Heaven above.

Thunder rolls beneath Heaven. It is in its nature. The ancient Kings, in tune with nature, took into account the changing seasons when making regulations and nourished all things. Success if you keep to your course. Mistakes if you stray from it; do as little as possible.

Vague, huh? Basically, what the I-Ching is saying is that right now, the Internet porn industry is unfolding as it should. What we do as an industry should be done in the spirit of natural progression. We are part of the future but we cannot mold the future. The successful among us are the ones that see the trends and follow them. Line two is the moving line and it re-iterates the point: We’re in the boat but we didn’t build the boat and we are not the captains.

10: LIH ­ Treading ­ The March Below. Heaven Above.

Thy sky above, the marsh below. The man discriminates between high and low and acts in accordance with the wishes of the people.

You tread the tail of the tiger. I does not bite you. Success.

The second Hexagram ­ LIH, describes the future in 2010. Here, the I-Ching gets all touchy-feely with our industry. This Hexagram says nothing bout whether or not our profession will still be open to the little guy or whether or not we’ll still be legal. Instead, the I-Ching warns us that we will become more and more isolated from society. The moving line sums it up succinctly:

"You are not involved in the rat race. You are free of the anxieties and doubts that attend others in pursuit of their insatiable desires. You are content and never become involved in personal conflicts."

Wasn’t that fun? Nostradamus ain’t got nothing on old Fu Hsi.

Stay tuned for part two of this article where I prognosticate free-style and finally get my cookie! Until then, follow your Tao, baby!

* I-Ching text taken from “I-Ching: A New Interpretation for Modern Times” by Sam Reifler/Bantam New Age Books, 1988