Once upon a time there was this very lucky webmaster. He was lucky because, while he slept, pixies would come and perform maintenance on his PC. The webmaster never had to worry about sluggish applications, annoying crashes or diminishing hard drive space. His machine was always clean, virus free and completely defragmented because he was the lucky webmaster, blessed by pixies.

Who is that lucky webmaster? Well, it isn’t you or me or any webmaster I have ever known. The truth is, I made the whole thing up. There are no maintenance pixies. There is no lucky webmaster. If you want to keep your computer running smooth, you’re on your own.

"The personal computer can perform amazing feats but despite all its abilities, it needs you to fight the dust bunnies and make the backups."

While computers can be programmed to perform a multitude of tasks automatically, they still need human upkeep. Heck, even in the future-fantasy world of the Jetsons, Spacely Sprockets needed George to push the button. The personal computer can perform amazing feats but despite all its abilities, it needs you to fight the dust bunnies and make the backups. As an adult webmaster, your machine is your livelihood.

Would you drive your car for months without changing the oil? Would you let your dishes sit in the sink for weeks? Will your garden stay beautiful without weeding and water? Would you people want to be around you if you stopped bathing and brushing your teeth? Your PC needs you and you need it in order to make a living as an adult webmaster.

The cool thing is that computer maintenance doesn’t take much time or skill. In fact, you can program your computer to perform most maintenance tasks automatically. Other tasks, while physical, aren’t particularly time intensive nor do you need to be an IT specialist to perform them.

Here are some easy things you can do to make sure your precious baby stays precious:

Be the Maid

Dust and debris might be harmless to your system but they can be deadly to a computer. Take a look at the back of your machine. If there’s a film of dust covering the venting for your PC fan, grab a dustcloth or handheld vacuum and make it go away. In fact, if you’re brave, turn off the PC, unplug everything and open up the case. See all that dirt? Blast it out with a can of good old compressed air. Check all your ports for dust. Examine your cords and make sure the cat hasn’t chewed on them. If kitty has done damage, get new cords. Clean up all that clutter around your comp and for heaven’s sake, throw out those damned pizza boxes and empty latte cups. Ants and roaches are no friends of your PC. Make sure your machine is in a cool, ventilated area. The faster the processor, the hotter it gets and while your internal fan is vital, it won’t protect your comp if you’ve got the thing flush against a wall with no airflow.

Be the Master

Remember that you’re in control. Those pixies aren’t going to protect your PC from viruses or spyware. That’s your job. If you have a broadband connection, then get a firewall like Zone Alarm. If you want to protect your comp from viruses, trojans and rootkits, get an anti-virus program like Norton. If you want to keep your machine free of spyware, then install an anti-spyware program like AdAware. Also, take advantage of the utility tools that come with your operating system. Defragment your hard drive. Scan it for errors. Flush out your temporary files and clean your browser cache. If you don’t want to spend staring at your monitor while your perform these tasks, no problem. You can schedule them to run while you sleep.

Be Prepared

In spite of all your TLC, something bad happens and you have to format your hard drive because your PC is FUBAR. Worse yet, you’ve lost all your files, images, contact info and the installation programs for your needed software. Yes, some bad, dirty bastard infected your machine and now everything’s gone. Just the same, it wouldn’t be that hard to restore everything if you had taken the time to make backup copies of your important stuff. Shit happens no matter how vigilant you are. Make backups. Make backups for your backups. Be prepared.

The average new computer costs roughly $1000.00. I don’t know about you but to me, that’s a hell of a lot of money to waste just because I neglected to take the time to maintain my machine. Run the protection and utility software. Download those OS updates. Keep your comp and the area around it clean. Turn the thing off once in a while to give it a rest. Make those backups.

Your computer isn’t some work horse you can ride hard and put away wet. Make the effort. Take the time. Your machine will last longer and work more efficiently is you Maintain your PC!