Shh. Don't tell anybody but I have a dirty secret.

"I can go as long as eight whole hours a day (not including sleep) without looking at my desktop or laptop. Trust me. For me, that's progress."

You know ICQ? Well, ever since I got the broadband, I have to keep that damned software turned on and logged in 24/7. I don't have a good excuse anymore like: "I'm sorry I missed your message. My Dial-up was offline all day." Or "I got bumped off just when you were going to tell me I'm an idiot for the fifth time."

Damned DSL.

So anyway, My secret is that sometimes I answer an instant text message a bit later than the next instant. I know. Shoot me. I'm the only adult webmaster that does it.

I love technology. I love computers. I love the web. I love the adult Internet industry. I love my cellphone. I love my satellite television network. I love my DVD player and my mp3 player. I love my electric scooter. I love lots of things.

I'm supposed to be writing an article about how it's important to turn off the cell, shut down the computer and click the power button on the television remote. You see, I'm a big techno-weenie and the idea of going cold turkey scares me. No Internet? No CNN? No Aliens DVD in the middle of the night? Game over, man? Nooo!

Then I thought about it some more. That's when I discovered I'm not as addicted as I feared.

The truth is, I'm not nearly as connected as I could be. I have a cellphone. I like my cellphone. I find my cellphone very useful and sometimes neccessary. But I don't use my cellphone to talk to other webmasters or do business. I use it to keep in touch with my kid and sometimes my sister. I had never owned a cellphone until two years ago. The only reason I bought it was because I didn't have broadband and I was on the Dial-up all the time. Now that I have broadband, my landline is free and suffices it to say I don't often give out my cell number.

More encouraging is that I'm not the slobbering zombie, sucking at Internet tit that I was five years ago. I've learned to WALK AWAY FROM THE MONITOR. I'm re-trained myself to STEP OUTSIDE or TALK WITH MY FAMILY, FRIENDS AND STRANGERS. It's taken me a while but I have re-discovered the REAL WORLD. I looked out side and it was spring. The sun was shining and REAL PEOPLE were busy living.

I can go as long as eight whole hours a day (not including sleep) without looking at my desktop or laptop. Trust me. For me, that's progress.

Of course, I'm lucky. I happen to have a sweet job and I work from home. I'm not in a big city with a bunch of adult Internet playas. I'm telecommuting from a small town in Texas. My boss is in Canada. As far as I know, I'm the only adult webmaster in my tiny area. This suits my somewhat hermetic nature just fine. I'm no longer a face-time kinda gal when it comes to making a living.

Just the same, I'm not completely weaned from the web and I can't shut it all off anytime I want to, not if I want to pay for all my lovely technological things. I have to do my research. I have to check my email. I have to chat with my employer and my peers. I have to visit message boards and read porn-related news. I have to watch C-Span and CNN in order to hear what "they" are saying about us. And those fucking blogs. Blogs are like cyber-crack to me.

Maybe that's why I made my confession on my dirty secret. I confess because I'm not that ashamed. I bet you do it too. I bet you take your sweet time to answer that semi-spam message from your buddy. I bet you set your status to invisible for some of the kids on your contact list. I bet you look at the number of the call you missed on your cell and think: "I'll phone them later, when I feel like it."

Don't be ashamed. Technology is fabulous! The Interweb is sweet! It's a damned miracle that we can talk and share and spread the wealth with anyone from anywhere. It's a great time to be alive. Just remember that the real purpose of technology is to make LIFE better, not the other way around.